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Finding Balance

Finding balance isn’t always easy. To be more specific, finding a good balance between being a mom and being yourself. I know that being a mom is obviously going to be a big part of who you are, BUT, what about the chick that used to stay up all night (I don’t mean worrying about the kids☺️) hanging with her friends, eating cold pizza for breakfast lunch and dinner until it was gone, or too gross to finish? Taking a shower whenever she felt like it AND getting FULLY ready like, the whole shebang, hair, makeup, outfit, having time alone to re-energize, basically living life for herself.

 I know to some people those things sound silly or even immature but, they’re just a few of the things that change in life when you become a mom. Life becomes less, MUCH less about yourself and much, much more about your family. My family is my life, pretty much everything I do is for them and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I think there’s a thin line to finding the right balance for being a happy mom & person. One thing I have found extremely useful is fully being myself in front of my kids, pretty much all the time. I know, this seems like a given. Why wouldn’t you be yourself? 

I remember as a new and very young mom thinking I wasn’t good enough because I didn’t have much in common with any of the other moms I had interacted with. Don’t get me wrong, they were always nice and their kids looked healthy and happy, I just had a hard time not comparing my personality to theirs and I honestly wasn’t finding common ground. So, thinking it was the right thing to do, I attempted to morph myself into a “good” mom. I tried to tuck away any traits that conflicted with the image I was aiming for. *Spoiler alert*-this didn’t work for me.

Our society has always put so much pressure on parents to be perfect. 

▪️Kids aren’t smiling 24/7? BAD MOM 

▪️Dinner isn’t made from scratch with the colors of the rainbow? BAD MOM 

▪️You don’t wake up at the ass-crack of dawn? BAD MOM 

▪️Kids aren’t in bed by 6pm? BAD MOM 

▪️Two year old says the F word loud and clear as could be in a room full of people? BAD MOM

I think if anything will truly make you a “bad mom” it’s trying to be someone you aren’t. It takes so much energy. Now, as I have matured I know that there is no right or wrong personality for being a great mom.  The key is to find your happy balance and to be true to yourself.

Here are a few ways I find my happy balance:?

?Obviously, I want to drink a bottle of wine and watch documentaries and then do some grown-up stuff with my love muffin ▫️BALANCE▫️ We make time for it a few times a month if not more. We make sure to get the kids to bed at a fairly decent time and once they’re asleep we pop that bottle of wine open ??

?I love going to the gym but I don’t love having to wait until Ian gets home from work ▫️BALANCE▫️ we switched to a gym that offers childcare.
?I enjoy working on growing this blog and its content but don’t want to spend every waking moment I have with my family on my computer or phone ▫️BALANCE▫️I wake up early, stay up late and work during nap-time.

?Most of my favorite music to listen to is explicit and offensive rap music, not exactly car filled with kiddos friendly ▫️BALANCE▫️I save it for the gym.

?I could eat cereal or Chipotle for literally every meal but my people need nutrients and variety ▫️BALANCE▫️ I do this typically once or twice a week, working really hard on keeping it to once!

?Coffee is my favorite ▫️BALANCE▫️ once or twice a week I pair it with a toddler singalong group at a local coffee shop.

Your kids just need you to be your own happy self. You are ALWAYS enough, I promise. ❤️

17 thoughts on “Finding Balance”

  1. 6 pm as a bed time– well I am a double bad mum becuase I am lucky if my kids are asleep by 10 or 11. Even if I make them lay down at 8pm. LOL

    1. Well mine aren’t asleep very early I’ll tell you that lol! We just have to struggle and outlast them! And that’s what I was saying…obviously none of those things actually make a bad mom, this is how people try and make us feel.

  2. Im not a mom so i cant even imagine how tougher it is to find that balance. But finding a healthy balance is definitely so important. Gives us the breather and frankly we need some good to outweight the bad or the stressful.

  3. How I remember the years of having little ones at home. I remember the looks at the grocery if one of the kids was crying, feeling like I was never good enough. It was tough. I love your perspective and passed your post along to my daughter. She’s a young mom now and we talk about finding balance all of the time. x

  4. Wow! You’re doing a great job at balancing! I’m not a mom yet so I didn’t exactly know that moms feel that way. But I’ll keep this in mind in case I get to be a mom in the near future. 🙂

  5. This is such a great post! I think even if you don’t have kids, like me, you need to be reminded of just balancing responsibility and personal enjoyment. We’ve all got things we “should” be doing to be more “responsible” or “adultish” yet staying true to your inner child is what keeps you sane. Making sure your happy will help the people around you be happy as well. I really enjoyed reading the post! There was such personality in your writing and so easy to read. Kudos!

  6. I really enjoyed reading this post. Society sucks with trying to make that so called ‘perfection’ in every.single.thing. I love how you find your balance, and I can relate to most of them #balancedmom Xoxo

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